Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
