My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
