Christians are straight up FREAKS
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
