Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
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