im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
