when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
