I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
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