Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I skipped work to stalk him.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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