I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
