whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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