New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
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