eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize
