My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
