Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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