i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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