She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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