well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
