he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize