Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
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