my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
We talked him into tasing himself.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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