I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize