She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
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