I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
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