i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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