i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
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