Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
