ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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