Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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