She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
