Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Are we still banned from the library?
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
