I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
God gave him joint rollers for hands
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
