My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize
