Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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