do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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