Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize