Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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