I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Blow job season was short but glorious.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Randomize
