We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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