Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
