If that was your dad, he is hot
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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