Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
You had me at "let me see your balls"
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
