Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
The feeling are messing with the penis
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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