im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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