i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Randomize