I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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