I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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