my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
