At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
So I just went to clothing optional bar
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
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