oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
