I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize