i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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